Where would you hide a moose?

I found this picture hanging around in my digital camera and thought I'd share it. I have posted it along with others over at my Buzznet page.

This seemed like a good excuse to remind everyone about my photos on Buzznet.

I will probably put some sort of a photo gallery on this site at some point, but I will also keep using Buzznet for all the little things. Besides, I can post to it easily from anywhere which I might not be able to do in a gallery here.

We'll see how things progress.

One angry man

In my earlier post I mentioned how my emotions had been heightened last night. Well, today wasn't much better. Only there was a significant difference...

Today I felt angry.

Not about anything in particular, just angry. Varying from a low simmer to a raging boil. From wanting to be left alone to wanting to put my fist through a wall. I didn't damage anything and just stuck with spending the day alone.

A don't know what I will be doing tomorrow night for New Year's Eve. I just hope that I can get whatever this is under better control before I do it.

My sister (by mutual consent) is having a housewarming which I am welcome to attend, only I am a couple thousand miles too far away to make it. I wish I could though.

I hope you all have something good planned and will not just be spending the night drinking alone.

Rough Night

Last night was a rough night for a couple of different reasons. My sinuses were acting up making it hard for me to breathe properly... My bloodsugar level was about 80 points higher than it should have been... And, to top it off, at 4am I was awake with tears in my eyes.

When my bloodsugar is that far off it can throw my system off as well. That includes physically, mentally, and emotionally. Especially emotionally. So that was definitely part of what happened about 4am, but certainly not all of it. Something had to be the trigger. When your (my) emotions get heightened like that it only heightens what is already there, it generally doesn't cause new feelings, although it can bring out feelings that you were trying to hide from yourself.

I'm not saying that I was trying to hide anything from myself, but then again, if I was would I have even known?

Granted, I do know there are a couple of things which have been weighing on my mind. I didn't think they were weighing that much...

I don't know if they were the cause or if there was something else.

Once I figure out how much of it I can post here I'll do it. I'd post some of it now, but there are other people involved and I don't want to cause problems for them.

Name Calling

I stopped to do some Christmas shopping on my way home from work tonight and couldn't believe what happened.

I asked one of the store assistants a couple of questions and then was able to figure out the rest based on her answers. And she said "You are a smart young man."

Can you believe it? It has been several a couple of years since any one referred to me as a "young man."

Well, at least it was said without any sarcasm. And it gave me feel good, if only for a moment, amid all the hassles that are Holiday Shopping™.

If this had happened over the weekend or earlier I might have said that it was the bright spot of my day. However, there has been a change this week which has caused a turn for the better. I don't want to say too much right now, so I'll just leave you all guessing what it could be. I'll just see where it goes.

And I'll hope things keep looking as good as they have for the last two days.

Walk in Beauty.

Cane Or Able?

My legs have been bothering me for a while now. Mainly it has been my knees acting up. Several times to the point where I needed to pull out my cane for the day. I guess all the drastic changes in the weather lately have been aggravating them.

Today was the second day in a row that we had good weather, and the first day in a quite a while that my knees actually felt good. It made for a nice change.

So tonight I went out for a walk and my knees held up pretty good, a little shaky but not too bad. However, my hip and back started to feel a little strained.

Partly it goes back to the hermitting I was doing. I was feeling depressed and wanted to keep to myself. The best way to do that was to just stay in.

Of course there is also the fact that when I was walking I was using a cane and therefore using slightly different muscles and using them in a different way. I just need to keep walking to make sure I get everything back the way it should be.

I'll let you know how it goes.

The 'lack of stories' story.

I know it has been a while since I posted. I am going to try to post more regularly, but don't hold me to that just yet. It is going to be a New Year's Resolution so I have a couple of weeks yet.

Anyway, there has been a lot going on at work lately, but not much else. A whole lot of nothing. It doesn't help that I was "hermitting" again. I did go see "Saw". I had heard good things about it, and it was an excuse to get out of the house.

All I will say about the movie for now is that I liked it. It is a very well done movie and doesn't try to give itself a typical "Hollywood" ending. When the movie ends there have been actual consequences for all the characters.

---

Anyway, this was just intended as a quick post to let people know that I am still alive, and still here. I still owe you a couple of stories. Ones I mentioned in comments on Scary Duck's blog. [Editor: A very good, and highly recommended blog.] and maybe a couple of other places. If you know of any I said I would post, or just any you would like to read, leave me comments below. I will post the stories eventually.

So I am still breathing, when my sinuses are clear enough. I am going to bed now, but I will be back soon.

No, there's no irony in this.

From Reuters News Service (Link goes to full article)

WWII Soldier Killed at Parade Honoring Veterans

BOSTON (Reuters) - William Hammond survived one of the bloodiest battles of World War II but died at a parade honoring him and others after a van at a Veteran's Day parade ran over him.

This happened just a mile or two up to road from where I work.

And to add to the irony, the van in question is owned by the local Veterans of Foreign Wars chapter.

Remembrance Day

Last year I posted two poems which everyone should go and (re)read. They are In Flanders Field and In Fields of Flanders.

...

My grandfather was born at the end of 1899 and was in both World Wars. Other friends and relatives have served in those wars and every one since. [*Edit: At least the wars which directly involved Canada and/or the United States. *] Some of them were not necessarily on the side you might expect. As an example, I knew at least one person who was served in the German Army around the time of World War II. I don't know if he served or fought during that war, only that at one time around then he was in the German army serving his mandatory service. Since he only served the mandatory tour of duty for the country where he was born and didn't talk about it, I don't know any more than that. I had known him as a friend's grandfather, who happened to live in our neighbourhood, for a long time before I ever learned that he was German or what that could have meant.

All of this helps me remember that ALL of the soldiers are people. Even if we think that the one side or the other is "evil" that might only apply to the leaders (if it applies to anyone), the individual soldiers might not agree with the leaders, but are sometimes forced to serve anyway.

What does that have to do with anything going on today?

Nothing. And everything.

Today is a day set aside for remembering all those who serve and have served. But we should not limit ourselves to only this one day.

And as it pertains to the fighting that is going on today... We need to remember that "the enemy" is also made up of people. Yes, some of them probably are very bad people who need to be stopped. But some of them may not believe in what they are being forced to fight for, and others may only be defending themselves.

[I imagine I will get a few negative comments on this post.]

Lest we forget...

Happy Halloween

Halloween used to be one of my favourite times of the year but then things happened which changed it all. Now I am starting to put some of it behind me and can enjoy Halloween again even if I don't go all out about it any more. I am not going to go into all of it tonight, but I will tell you the story of the straw that broke the camel's back.

I used to go to haunted houses whenever I had the chance and then a few years back I started working at one. I worked two or three nights a week for the duration of the season, the month of October, at least until the owners decided that I wasn't allowed to work there anymore. The reason they gave was that I was too scary.

So I was too scary to work at some place called "The Haunted Mansion" whose whole purpose was to scare people.

Yeah, it made that much sense to me as well.

Now, the part of it which really upset me and turned me off the whole thing wasn't that they decided not to let me work there any more, what pissed me off was that I heard about it when other people who worked there started contacting me and saying "I heard what happened and I'm sorry." To which my reply was "What the hell are you talking about?"

Eventually I was able to piece together the story, no thanks to the owners or operators of the house. I called and emailed them but they would not respond. Nothing. They acknowledged my attempts to friends of mine, but that was it.

Apparently it was one parent who complained and had me removed from the house. She said I scared her daughter too much. Since the owners of the house wouldn't talk to me, let alone listen to my side of things, I am going to tell you what happened.

The girl in question came through and I did my job and tried to scare her. At this point her only reaction was to threaten to "mace" me. She then immediately reached into her purse, pulled out a small spray canister, and sprayed me in the face. Needless to say I was caught off guard and it took a couple of seconds before I realized it wasn't mace, pepper spray, or anything like that. It was perfume.

I don't think I have to say that I was not happy with this girl. So I pulled out the stops, without breaking any of the house rules (I didn't touch, trap, or block her in any way) and gave her a scare. Adding my anger into the mix was enough to actually scare her and while she left the one area, she did not leave the house. I know this because she came back later and mouthed off some more. This got a scowl as a reply but nothing else. I knew that if I did more I would have used language which would have made a gangsta rapper blush. Safer to not say anything. But as it turns out not safe either.

And that was the end of that.

That was three years ago and this weekend was the first time I have been back. I was back there as a customer, and to see friends of mine who still work there. I had seen these friends in the meantime, I work with one of them, but I hadn't seen them in this environment. It is too late for me to go into what happened, but I will say that I enjoyed it. Look for that story in the coming week.

In the meantime I am off to bed and, hopefully, to sleep.

Peace.

Can a Narcoleptic get Insomnia?

As those of you I talk to personally may know, I have been having trouble sleeping for a while. This happens to me from time to time and has recently come back.

It has been going on for a while and I have talked to my doctor about it. She gave me some advice along with a list of things to do which should help. This list includes some standard things like "Don't ingest any thing containing caffeine past noon", "Maintain constant bed/wake times even when you don't have to get up", etc. Some of these are common sense (although that doesn't mean I was doing them) while others I never would have thought of. I am doing my best to follow them.

She also gave me a prescription for a "sleep aid" with the caveat not to take it every night. She said I should only take it when things get too bad. If you take it too much you can become dependent on it.

I think I'll be taking it tonight, and possibly for the weekend as well.

For the past couple of weeks I have been getting about 3-4 hours of sleep a night during the week and then getting 10-12 hours a night on the weekend. None of this sleep has been very restful. And now it has gotten to the point where I can barely sleep at night and can barely stay awake during the day.

I feel like I have insomnia and narcolepsy at the same time. If I lie down I'm awake. If I sit or stand I can't keep my eyes open.

It's enough to drive a sane man round the bend, and I am making no claims as to which side of that bend I was on when this started.

Maybe I should just try sleeping in a nice comfy chair instead of lying in bed tonight. However, while getting to sleep tonight might be difficult, I think getting out of bed at the normal (read: workday) time over the weekend will be even more difficult.

Geez, I feel like taking a nap.